Women make up over 50% of the US Olympic Team for the first time this Olympics, and women have really been dominating this Olympics like no other before it. So many of our League teams are built on the backs of awesome female athletes like Simone Biles and Katie Ledecky, and our highest scoring swimmer turned out to be Katinka Hosszu.  

Twenty six out of the forty five members of the League are ladies themselves, yet, we have yet to crack the medal stand in over a week! What gives, ladies? It\’s 2016. We can be Fantasy Olympics champions! If we can be ghostbusters now, we can be anything.

I suppose it\’s for the best though because I love and admire all the ladies in this League and if they were to start having some success, I might have to start talking about their physical appearance or irrelevant family history. I mean, looking at the leaderboard right now, I can\’t help but mention that obviously Queen Alice of Barrettania\’s husband is 100% responsible for her success. Also, I heard that Her Majesty Ramba of Swainzia puts her hair in a ponytail when she exercises. President LeUSAh of Travoltaland doesn\’t even know all the dance moves to the Travoltaland national anthem. And Pope Liz of Reederhoffia might be so sad about her team that she looks visibly disappointed in public. But I sure hope not.

Anyway, back to watching NBC\’s coverage of men standing around waiting for their events to start.


P.S. Your Hugeness Mark G of Trumputopia (another blog post for another time, trust me) has suggested a modern day letter writing campaign to tweet @gabrielledoug to let her know that we\’re proud she\’s representing us no matter what Internet idiots have to say. Consider joining in!